On Being Alone Today.

This week feels loud in many ways. 

So loud that when it’s quiet-- maybe late at night or in the early hours-- there's a smaller, softer ache that you've been noticing and telling me about. 

You remind me that between the calls to be among people and find your community there is a quiet sense of loneliness.  Maybe the feeling has always been there.  For others, feeling lonely weighs heavier right now.

It’s possible that when things feel unsettled we look up from our phones and our screens and our lists. 

We wonder who will be there for us in the late hours.

And most of all, we wonder who knows us.  Really knows us.


Here are some ideas about how to sit with the feeling of being alone—and then move toward connection if you'd like.

Pick your favorite mug.  Pour your favorite tea.  Invite a friend to join you if you like.

Call that person you’ve been meaning to call.

Ask someone you trust to be there for you.  (It’s okay to ask for what you need.)

Wear your softest socks today.

Make eye contact with a stranger in place of your phone.

Take five deep breaths.  Exhale slowly, each time. 

(Go ahead.  Try it here.)

Hang a picture of someone you love.  It’s been a while since you saw her face.

Check your Facebook or Instagram or Twitter with intention.  Gently remind yourself of your limits.  

Unplug as needed. 

Call someone and ask her to take a walk with you.

Play a favorite song.

Eat warm food.  

Stretch.  Like a cat.  


How will you make room for both loneliness and connection?  I’d love to hear from you.